1. At any given time, if you're listening to the show, you're probably the only person.
2. Listen live Friday nights. Except when the show is prerecorded. Which it always is. And when the wrong show airs. Which is often. Or when it starts late. Which has happened. Or when it doesn't air at all. Which has also happened.
3. The term "Pretend Radio" refers to any radio that does not air on FM/AM or SiriusXM and the talent is not paid for his time and effort.
4. The term "Real Radio" refers to any radio that airs on either FM/AM or SiriusXM and the talent is paid for his time and effort.
5. Brad has a sound effects board more complicated than the Malaysian instructions for your latest assemble-it-yourself entertainment center. Remember that when the wrong effect plays.
6. Brad loves attention. Show him some love, and you'll earn a special place in his heart. Right next to the one reserved for himself, his family, and chocolate marshmallow ice cream.
7. Ignore Rule Number 6...because that's what everyone else does.
8. Brad hates to lose. When competing with him, throw the match. You're better off that way. If he's not playing and merely hosting, laugh at his jokes. All of them. In fact, laugh at everything he says.
9. Magic Matt gave up his fanship in the Cubs only to replace it with... the Royals. Remember that when dealing with him. Remember, too, that he's the most rational guy on the show. Set expectations accordingly.
10. Afkar is very, very sensitive. Handle only with a thick protective layer of Charmin and Puffs.
11. When the show ends, 'we're all friends again'.
Noteworthy but did not make the cut:
It'd be nice if Batman had a homuculus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homunculus) on that utility belt of his. Failing that, an electric razor. Wearing that mask must really chafe.